friendship: nostalgia from across the pond

Today I’ve been thinking about friendship: what it means to be a friend and how friendships impact your life. I’ve been very lucky and blessed with the friends that I have. When I was younger, I had no worries or cares. I was friends with pretty much everyone I met. They were all my best friends forever. Then I got a little older and I realized that the world could be cruel and there were people that would hurt you. And that’s when the friends that you have become more…real. The ones that are beside you getting made fun of too, the ones that hold you while you tell them the stories between sobs, the ones that get angry and go off to stand up for you because you couldn’t do it for yourself. And then I got older again and I didn’t care as much about those that didn’t like me. The friends I’d had as a child had almost all gone away now, save a couple. We had different interests and had grown apart. Nothing wrong with that, it happens. But those two friends I’d had that had stuck with me through it all…they stayed around a little longer. I switched high schools and they stayed. I made new friends, ones I could sit with at lunch. I made them laugh and they made me smile and that was enough for us. We’d pass notes in classes and hang out after school. By the end of high school, most of them had drifted away as well. Then at university I made a few new friends, people to sit next to in class and text when I'd forgotten the assignment due date. These friends - the ones from high school and college - are nice to have and nice to keep in touch with, but they're not the ones you call immediately when something fun or interesting happens. The friends I have now are great,  These women are my life. I have taken parts of them and made them a part of me. Lauren, my sister, and her sharp wit and impeccable taste in TV, music, movies, books, and basically everything else in life; Kate’s warm and open heart; Mariah's sharp intelligence and sense of humor; Marcela’s confidence and determination; Jessica’s loyalty and firm 'no judgment' policy. All of these aspects have been amplified in myself because of how I’ve seen these amazing women portray them. I may be more careful now than when I was a child with whom I let into my life, but I consider this a good thing. These are all women who fill my life with happiness and laughter and that warm cherished feeling that only friendship can bring.

My sister Lauren and I, back home in Arkansas in November 2011 - photo courtesy of Katie Childs

Kate Lambert Davis and I in San Gimignano, Italy in November 2011 |edit - Kate is now Kate Davis, not Lambert. I keep forgetting to put her married name, despite the fact that she's been Davis now for over a year.|

Mariah Elkins and I in Florida in August 2014

Marcela Montelongo and I at Graceland in Memphis, TN in September 2012

Jessica Tarkington and I from some time in the not too distant past (horrible photo quality because I don't have any photos of us so I had to screenshot this from my iPhone, and also I couldn't figure out how to crop it)

So my words to you are: choose people that surround you with qualities you wished you possessed. Find people who love you for your faults as well as your attributes. Find people who will let you be sad if you want to, but cheer you up when you don’t. Find those that just make being around them easy and effortless. That’s all you need.